Escape to Paradise: Blue Velvet Hotel & Cafe Davao Awaits!
Okay, buckle up buttercups, because reviewing a hotel is like trying to describe a dream you had while simultaneously juggling chainsaws. It's messy, it's chaotic, and hopefully, a little bit entertaining. Let's dive into this behemoth of a hotel review, SEO-optimized and personality-laden, all rolled into one glorious mess. But first, a little… ahem… metadata, for the Google gods:
Metadata:
- Title: Over-the-Top Hotel Review! Accessibility, Spa, Food, and a Touch of Chaos (and Free Wi-Fi!)
- Meta Description: Dive into a brutally honest review of this hotel, covering EVERYTHING: accessibility, delicious food, spa treatments, and the all-important free Wi-Fi. Expect anecdotes, opinions, and a healthy dose of real-life hotel mess!
- Keywords: Hotel Review, Accessibility, Spa, Restaurant, Free Wi-Fi, Wheelchair Accessible, Spa Review, Travel Review, Hotel Food, Luxury Hotel, Review, Best Hotels
Alright, now for the real meat. Let's start, as one does, with the… clears throat dramatically… Accessibility.
Oh, the joys of being a human in a hotel. You know, sometimes I wonder if the architects even consider folks in wheelchairs? Well, this place… it's a mixed bag. Wheelchair accessible? Yup, they say so. The lobby? Grand and spacious, easy peasy. Getting to the elevator? Generally okay. But you know how it is – those little design choices can make or break everything. I remember trying to get into the restaurant (more on that later – food is a whole other beast!), and the ramp was so steep I almost needed a mountain climbing guide. Seriously! But they did have ramps, which is more than can be said for some places. Facilities for disabled guests should be a priority. I have seen better… I have seen worse.
And then there’s the stuff behind the scenes. Elevator? Check. Exterior corridors—nope from some sections. And what about the rooms? Well, that’s a whole other story.
Now, let's talk about what truly matters: the Internet.
Free Wi-Fi in all rooms! Hallelujah! Someone understands the modern traveler's addiction! And the connection? Pretty solid, if I'm honest. I mean, I could stream a whole afternoon of cat videos without buffering nightmares, which, let's be real, is all I really need from life sometimes. They also had Internet [LAN] if you're old-school and into that (I judge a little), plus Internet services in general, so, points for being connected. Wi-Fi in public areas also seemed pretty reliable but I mostly camped in my room, surrounded by the comforting glow of my laptop screen.
Speaking of the rooms…
Available in all rooms: Okay, let's do a rapid-fire round, shall we? Air conditioning - essential. Check. Alarm clock – who uses these anymore? Still there. Bathrobes – yes, yes, yes! Bathtub – a luxurious soak after a long day? Yes please! Blackout curtains…needed! Because sleep is sacred. Coffee/tea maker – a lifesaver, especially early morning. Complimentary tea – classy. Free bottled water – hydration is key, people! Hair dryer – can't leave the house without it. In-room safe box – always a good idea. Internet access – wireless – you know it! Ironing facilities – because wrinkles are the enemy. Mini bar – tempting, but probably overpriced. Non-smoking – thank goodness. Private bathroom – duh. Satellite/cable channels – the ultimate comfort food. Shower – important. Soundproofing – wish it were better. Towels – fluffy and plentiful. Wi-Fi [free] – the hero we deserve. Honestly, the rooms are pretty much set. The only thing missing? A personal chef to bring me snacks. Okay, okay…I get into details later.
And now for the fun stuff, the stuff that makes or breaks a hotel: Things to do, ways to relax.
The Spa! Oh, the spa. This is where I'd happily hand over all my money and just… vanish. They had Sauna, Steamroom, a Pool with view (gorgeous!), and a whole menu of Spa/sauna treatments. I got a Body scrub and a Massage. The massage was… well, let's just say I almost fell asleep and snored, which is my highest compliment. I also took a dip in the Swimming pool [outdoor] and took a long time to just stare.
They also had a Fitness center and a Gym/fitness, which, let's be honest, I only walked past. But hey, if you're into that sort of thing, it's there.
Alright and onwards to the Dining, drinking, and snacking!
This is where things got REAL. The restaurants were a mixed bag. They had A la carte in the restaurant…and a Buffet in restaurant. Let me tell you about the buffet: it’s a wonderland of possibilities, a feast for all the senses! Asian breakfast, International cuisine in restaurant, Western breakfast… you could sample everything, from the weird and wonderful to the comfort classics. I swear, my plate was a chaotic masterpiece of cultural fusion. I have nothing but love.
They had the Coffee shop… which was a haven for caffeine addicts like myself. Poolside bar to take a cold drink after sunbathing. The Snack bar was great for a quick bite. The Bar was nice. And the Room service [24-hour] meant I could order a midnight snack and pretend I was a sophisticated jet-setter. That also means that the Breakfast in room was not the best but hey, it exists, right?
I tried the Vegetarian restaurant. Okay, to be frank, it was good. They had some absolutely mouth-watering dishes.
Now, a few things that I really… appreciated:
- Breakfast takeaway service – perfect for those mornings when you just want to grab and go.
- Bottle of water – hydration, again!
- Coffee/tea in restaurant – a must.
- Happy hour – essential for unwinding after a long day.
Oh, and one final, important note! The Desserts in restaurant… oh, my. Just… chef's kiss.
And the Staff?
The team was pretty on point in most areas. The Front desk [24-hour] was always available. They seemed well-trained in safety protocol. The Doorman was always there to help with packages. As well as Concierge that helped with great restaurant selections.
Cleanliness and Safety:
This is where they REALLY shined. Rooms sanitized between stays – HUGE. Hand sanitizer everywhere. Daily disinfection in common areas. Anti-viral cleaning products. All the boxes checked!
Services and Conveniences:
They've got everything, people! Cash withdrawal, Concierge, Currency exchange, Daily housekeeping, Dry cleaning, Elevator, Facilities for disabled guests, Food delivery, Gift/souvenir shop, Invoice provided, Ironing service, Laundry service, Luggage storage, you name it, they have it. Plus, the Contactless check-in/out was a Godsend – who wants to deal with small talk after a long flight?!
The Family/child friendly designation is accurate.
In Conclusion:
This hotel is a solid choice. It has its quirks, yes, but the good outweighs the bad. The Wi-Fi? Phenomenal. The food? Generally delicious. The spa? Pure bliss. The accessibility? Could be better, but they make an effort.
Overall, I left feeling refreshed, well-fed, and slightly less stressed than when I arrived. And isn't that what a good hotel should achieve? I give it a solid 4 out of 5 stars.
- SEO Score: High (Hopefully, I've crammed enough keywords in here!)
- Emotional Rating: Mostly positive, with a healthy dose of realistic cynicism.
- Would I stay again? Absolutely! (Especially for that dessert menu…)
P.S. If you're reading this from the hotel… can you please send more chocolate to my room? Thanks!
Escape to Paradise: Olavo Bilac Hotel, Taubaté, Brazil
Alright, buckle up buttercups, because this isn't your grandma's itinerary. This is a Davao City, Philippines, adventure at the Blue Velvet Hotel & Cafe, prepped by yours truly, resident chaos agent. Get ready for a roller coaster, because trust me, the travel gods are never predictable.
Day 1: Arrival, Anticipation, and Questionable Coffee Choices
- 13:00: Touchdown in Davao! (Finally! My flight was delayed for what felt like an eternity. I swear, I’m pretty sure I saw a tiny, agitated Chihuahua throwing side-eye at the gate agent. Seriously, the airport energy was off the charts weird.) Prebooked grab car to Blue Velvet Hotel & Cafe.
- (14:00): Check-in at Blue Velvet. OMG, the lobby is actually kinda… cool. Yeah, a tiny bit cramped but the vintage vibe is kinda working for me. That velvet… well, it's a lot. A lot of blue velvet. I'm getting the feeling I might need a nap - and maybe therapy.
- 14:30 : After all of my delays, I am starving! Head straight to Blue Velvet cafe to have my first meal. I ordered a coffee, and a mango juice. I do not like coffee. I do not want coffee. I am drinking coffee because I am tired and need to appear functional. The mango juice? Divine. I've never tasted a mango so good.
- 15:00: Room Reconnaissance. Okay, the room is smaller than I expected, but hey, it's clean-ish. There's a slightly musty smell, but I'm blaming it on the humidity. The air con is blasting, which is amazing. I threw my bag on the bed (which is surprisingly comfy) and then promptly collapsed in a heap. After all of my journey, I need a nap.
- 17:00: Wake up with a jolt and a sudden, overwhelming craving for… something fried. This might be a sign.
- (18:00): Explore the area around the hotel. Let's see what's actually near, before sunset.
- 19:00: Dinner at "A Taste of Davao" -- (Google Reviews said it was a “hidden gem.”). Ordered a plate of Kinilaw (fish ceviche) and a beer, assuming I will like it. The ceviche was… an experience. The fish was incredibly fresh, but the vinegar… WOAH. It hit hard. A wave of tartness went straight to my brain. I loved it.
- 20:30: Nightcap back at the Blue Velvet. The cafe is kinda empty this time of night, a few couples here and there, deep in conversation. The lighting is low, making the blue velvet even more intense. Maybe the blue velvet is starting to grow on me.
Day 2: Markets, Monkeys, and Existential Pizza
- 08:00: Wake up slightly hung over from the beer I took, and regretting all of my life choices. Scarf down a breakfast of (the highly rated) longganisa (Filipino sausage) and rice at the hotel. It was amazing. I need to find out the recipe for this sausage.
- 09:00: Take a taxi to Bankerohan Public Market. Okay, this place is sensory overload in the best possible way. Fish, and so many different types of fruit, and the scents… It's alive! Got some rambutan (love the skin!) and durian. I understand why some people love it so much, it just tastes… complicated. I love it though.
- 11:00: Travel to Davao Crocodile Park!! So, this place is a bit… kitsch, but the crocs are impressive. The sheer size of these ancient reptiles is humbling. The monkey exhibit was… let's just say, the monkeys are judging me hard.
- 13:00: Lunch at the Croc Park Cafe. I was expecting the food to be terrible to be totally honest. Ordered a croc burger (yes, really.) and fries, it was an unusual but decent. The fries were a delight.
- 14:00: Explore the park more.
- 15:00: Trip back to the hotel.
- 16:00: Decide I need a nap.
- 18:00: Try out one of the food in the hotel's cafe. I ordered a pizza. It was… let's just say it wasn't your New York-style pizza, and I'm not sure what I was expecting. It had a weirdly sweet flavor.
- 19:00: I'm not even sure what to do tonight. I might just wander around and see what happens. I am going to be honest, I'm not a huge planner in the slightest.
- 21:00: Back at the hotel. The blue velvet is starting to become overwhelming. It's all blue and velvet. I'm pretty sure it's seeping into my dreams. But, the air con is blasting again, so it can't be all bad.
Day 3: Islands, Beach Vibes, and the Great Mango Debate
- 07:00: Wake up. Get ready to go to the island.
- 08:00: Breakfast at the hotel, this time with much more longganisa AND rice.
- (09:00): Head to Island Garden City of Samal. Beach time! The speedboat ride was exhilarating, slicing through the waves. White sand, turquoise water, pure bliss. I found a little cove and just… breathed. I am going to have an amazing tan.
- 12:00: Lunch at a beachside shack. Fresh seafood, perfect, but I had even better mango juice.
- 13:00: Stay on the beach.
- 16:00: Head back to the hotel.
- 18:00: Time for a proper feast! Head to "Penong's" (recommended by a local). Grilled seafood (shrimp and tuna are a must!) and so much rice.
- 19:30: Coffee and mango. I am not a coffee person. I am a mango person. I love mango.
- (20:00): Pack up my things.
- 21:00: Write notes of this trip.
- 22:00: Sleep.
Day 4: Farewell, Davao! (With a Tear in My Eye)
- 07:00: Last breakfast at Blue Velvet. I actually think I'm going to miss this place. The staff are lovely, and the blue velvet… well, it's memorable, for sure. But I'm happy to leave, but sad.
- 08:00: Check out. Time to go.
- 09:00: Taxi to the airport.
- 11:00: Say goodbye to Davao.
Overall Reflections:
- Davao City is a riot of color, sound, and flavor. The people are friendly. I love the mangoes.
- Blue Velvet is a hotel. A memorable experience. I'll never forget it.
- I am going to miss Davao City, the food, the heat, and most of all, the mangoes.
- Travel is messy, imperfect, and sometimes, absolutely beautiful.
So, like, what *is* "The Great Unexplained" anyway? (Because honestly, I still don't quite get it...)
And *that's* the problem. It's so... broad. It's like trying to define "The Universe". Good luck with that.
Okay, but *why* am I suddenly obsessed with all this weirdness? Is it a mid-life crisis thing? (I'm totally not at that age, am I?)
What's the *most* ridiculous thing you've encountered while researching The Great Unexplained?
Speaking of aliens, what's your take on the whole UFO/UAP situation? Real, fake, or something in-between? Spill the tea!
Ghosts, spirits, the paranormal – believe it or not?
What's the single most frustrating thing about researching The Great Unexplained?
