Escape to Paradise: Ocean Mile Hotel's Fort Lauderdale Luxury Awaits!
Escape to Paradise… Or Did I? My Unfiltered Ocean Mile Hotel Review
Okay, so they call it "Escape to Paradise: Ocean Mile Hotel's Fort Lauderdale Luxury Awaits!" and, well, the marketing folks certainly built it up. I've got to be honest, unpacking this whole experience is a bit like untangling one of those holiday light strands after a year in the attic – you're bound to find a few tangled messes, a couple of burned-out bulbs, and a whole lot of memories you didn't even know you had. Buckle up, buttercups, because this is gonna be… detailed. And yeah, probably a little messy.
Accessibility - The Good, The Bad, And The Staircase I'm Apparently Still Haunted By:
First things first. Accessibility. Look, I'm not in a wheelchair, but I appreciate a well-thought-out space for everyone. And the Ocean Mile Hotel… it's a mixed bag. Wheelchair accessible? They claim it. And they do have an elevator, which is essential. HOWEVER… navigating the lobby, with its slightly awkward layout and the occasional narrow passage, felt a bit like a treasure hunt. There were ramps where you'd expect them, but also some weird steps I swear I saw the ghosts of previous guests struggling with. They list Facilities for disabled guests, so hopefully, they're constantly working on improvements.
On-site accessible restaurants / lounges: Frankly? I didn't dive deep into this one. I was more focused on finding the damn bathroom after a particularly potent mojito. But, from what I saw, access wasn't completely impossible, but could definitely be improved.
Internet – The Eternal Struggle:
Okay, this is where things get… frustrating. "Free Wi-Fi in all rooms!" they crow. And technically, it's true. Technically. The connection was… let’s just say it wasn't always a speed demon. Trying to upload photos of that incredible sunset? Forget about it. Internet access was available, Internet [LAN] was a pipe dream (remember those?), and the Internet services themselves were… variable. The Wi-Fi in public areas was slightly more reliable, but still, you'd think they'd invest in something a bit less… dial-up. (Okay, before you send me hate mail, I am exaggerating. Slightly.)
(Emotional Reaction: Ugh. The internet. It became a running joke between me and the bartender, who seemed to understand my silent rage every time I tried to download my emails.)
Things to Do (and Ways to Almost Relax):
This is where the Ocean Mile Hotel tries to shine. And sometimes, it does. Let's break it down:
- Ways to Relax:
- Body scrub, Body wrap, Massage, Spa, Spa/sauna, Sauna, Steamroom, Foot bath: They have all these things. The Spa was… pretty good. The massage? Worth every penny. Seriously, I was so tense from… well, life.
- Swimming pool, Swimming pool [outdoor], Pool with view: The pool with a view was stunning. Like, postcard-worthy. The swimming pool itself was lovely. It was usually crowded, but hey, that's the price of paradise (or at least, a heavily-advertised facsimile).
- Fitness center, Gym/fitness: Truthfully? I looked at both of these, then opted for another margarita. My inner couch potato won. Sorry, fitness enthusiasts.
(Quirky Observation: I swear I saw a guy in the sauna who looked like he was personally responsible for the invention of sweat. Also, the pool bar's frozen drinks are both a blessing and a curse.)
Cleanliness and Safety – The COVID Conundrum:
Let's be real. The pandemic has changed everything. And the Ocean Mile Hotel seemed to be trying. Anti-viral cleaning products, Daily disinfection in common areas, Hygiene certification, Individually-wrapped food options, Physical distancing of at least 1 meter, Professional-grade sanitizing services, Room sanitization opt-out available, Rooms sanitized between stays, Safe dining setup, Sanitized kitchen and tableware items, Staff trained in safety protocol, Sterilizing equipment, Cashless payment service, Hand sanitizer, and Staff trained in safety protocol. Whew. That's a lot. I felt relatively safe. The room sanitization seemed legit. And the hand sanitizer was strategically placed. BUT… I wouldn't say it was obsessively clean. Some corners looked like they'd seen better days.
(Emotional Reaction: Look, they were trying. But the constant vigilance felt exhausting. It’s like even on vacation, you’re still worried about potential contamination.)
Also, I did not see a Doctor/nurse on call so that could be a con for some.
Dining, Drinking, and Snacking – The Culinary Adventure (with some bumps along the way):
This is where things get really mixed.
Restaurants: There were Restaurants. Multiple. And in theory, a lot of variety. Asian breakfast, Asian cuisine in restaurant, International cuisine in restaurant, Vegetarian restaurant, Western breakfast, Western cuisine in restaurant.
The Good: The Breakfast [buffet] was… okay. The Coffee shop was a lifesaver for my caffeine addiction. Their Happy hour offerings at the Poolside bar was where I spent most of my afternoon. The restaurant's A la carte in restaurant, when you could get it, was lovely.
The Bad: The Buffet in restaurant was sometimes crowded. The Alternative meal arrangement was a bit unclear. The service at times was slow. The Room service [24-hour] was a godsend at 3 am. The Desserts in restaurant looked better than they tasted, I'm not even going to lie.
On the fence: The Bar, well, it depends on who's working. The Soup in restaurant was decent. The Salad in restaurant was nothing to write home about. The Bottle of water… well, it was a bottle of water. The Coffee/tea in restaurant was fine.
(Anecdote: One night, I ordered room service, and they brought the wrong dish. I was too hangry to argue, so I ate it anyway. It was… an experience. But the fries were good.)
Services and Conveniences – The Little Things (and the Not-So-Little Ones):
Okay, there's a lot. This list is extensive.
- The Good: Air conditioning in public areas, Concierge, Daily housekeeping, Doorman, Elevator, Facilities for disabled guests, Food delivery, Luggage storage, Meeting/banquet facilities, On-site event hosting, Car park [free of charge], Car park [on-site], Safety deposit boxes, Terrace.
- The Okay: Air conditioning in public area, Audio-visual equipment for special events, Business facilities, Cash withdrawal, Contactless check-in/out, Convenience store, Currency exchange, Dry cleaning, Essential condiments, Gift/souvenir shop, Indoor venue for special events, Invoice provided, Ironing service, Laundry service, Meeting stationery, Outdoor venue for special events, Projector/LED display, Seminars, Shrine, Smoking area, Wi-Fi for special events, Xerox/fax in business center,
- The Could-Be-Better: Delivery was a bit slow. The front desk [24-hour] was a lifesaver. The Meeting/banquet facilities felt a bit dated, but it worked.
(Quirky Observation: That gift shop sells the weirdest souvenirs. Seriously, I saw a ceramic flamingo wearing a tiny sombrero.)
For the Kids – Because Why Not?:
- Babysitting service, Family/child friendly, Kids facilities, Kids meal – I have no kids, so I didn't investigate this closely. But I saw some happy families.
Access – The Nuts and Bolts:
- CCTV in common areas, CCTV outside property, Check-in/out [express], Check-in/out [private], Exterior corridor, Fire extinguisher, Front desk [24-hour], Hotel chain, Non-smoking rooms, Security [24-hour], Smoke alarms, Soundproof rooms Mostly as expected.
Getting Around – Hit or Miss
- Airport transfer – Worked nicely.
- Bicycle parking – Didnt use.
- Car park [free of charge], Car park [on-site], Car power charging station, Taxi service, Valet parking - a nice perk if you have a car.
Available in all Rooms – The Standard Stuff (and some surprises):
This list is long, they had all the basics. However.
- I'm just going to break this single experience out of this and say… the Mirror was placed ridiculously high. I've never felt so short in my life.
- The Additional toilet was a luxury.
- The shower was a good size.
- The beds were comfortable.
Okay, buckle up buttercups, because this isn't your average, sterile travel itinerary. This is me, unleashed, stumbling around the Ocean Mile Hotel in Fort Lauderdale, Florida, with a notepad and a serious addiction to iced coffee. Prepare for a chaotic, possibly delicious, and definitely caffeinated ride.
Itinerary: Ocean Mile Hotel – Fort Lauderdale (AKA: My Attempt at Paradise)
(Disclaimer: This is a suggestion. My actual days might involve a lot more of me staring blankly at the ocean and questioning all my life choices. Don't judge.)
Day 1: Arrival, Initial Panic, and the Quest for Caffeine
1:00 PM: Land at Fort Lauderdale-Hollywood International Airport (FLL). Ugh, airports. The lighting is always terrible, the lines are endless, and you inevitably smell someone's questionable travel cologne. This time, the culprit was definitely a guy wearing a Hawaiian shirt.
2:00 PM: Uber to Ocean Mile Hotel. Praying to the travel gods that the driver isn't one of those chatty types. Though, honestly, after the airport, I'd probably welcome the distraction.
2:30 PM: Check-in. I hope the room actually looks like the pictures. You know, the ones where the bed is magically made and the towels are perfectly folded. Narrator voice: Spoiler alert, it probably won't.
3:00 PM: Immediate and Urgent Search for Coffee. Ocean Mile Hotel, you better have some decent java. My survival depends on it. If not, I'm hunting down a Starbucks. No shame. None.
3:30 PM - 5:00 PM: Unpack (ish). Okay, maybe I’ll just shove everything in a drawer and promise myself I’ll sort it later. The ocean is calling, and laundry can wait. Find my happy place on the balcony, or close to it, looking at that beautiful and gorgeous sea. Sigh. Yes, I'll need to get comfortable with my book. And the view. Definitely the view.
5:00 PM - 6:00 PM: Beach Time! (Attempted) - I have this romantic notion of strolling along the shore, feeling the sand between my toes, and finding inner peace. In reality, I'll probably trip over a rogue shell, get sand everywhere, and worry about getting a sunburn before I remember to apply sunscreen.
6:00 PM - 7:00 PM: Sunset Cocktails at the Hotel Bar (If it has one. Praying again). Ideally, a fancy, fruity drink with an umbrella. I'm easily pleased. Also I really need to take some lovely pictures for the memories.
7:00 PM - 8:00 PM: Dinner. Seafood, obviously. Lobster rolls? Yes, please. Sushi? Maybe. But only if it's good sushi. No rubbery fish for this girl. Gotta look for something close to the hotel
8:00 PM - 9:00 PM: Stroll along the beach. Or back to the room, depending on how much I've had to drink. Let’s be real, I'm probably falling asleep by 9:00 PM. Jet lag is a beast.
Day 2: Beach, Boat, and a Possible Breakdown
8:00 AM: Wake up, stare at the ceiling and then at the view and ask myself "What am I doing with my life?" (The answer, usually, is "Trying to relax"). Make coffee if the hotel doesn't disappoint. Take a long luxurious shower.
9:00 AM: Breakfast. Hoping for more than just stale pastries. Maybe a little fruit, some eggs, and a side of existential dread.
9:30 AM - 12:00 PM: BEACH. This time, I'll actually bring sunscreen. Maybe even a hat. No sand-related casualties today, I hope! This time I’ll be properly prepared. I'll read, I'll nap, I'll contemplate the meaning of life while listening to the waves. You know, the usual.
12:00 PM - 1:00 PM: Quick lunch at a beachside cafe. Gotta fuel up for the afternoon adventure. Fish tacos? Yes, definitely.
1:30 PM - 4:30 PM: Boat Tour! (Fingers crossed that I don't get seasick). I've booked a tour to check out the yachts, the mansions, and hopefully, spot a dolphin or two. I envision myself effortlessly gliding through the water, hair blowing in the wind, living my best life. Realistically? I'll probably be slightly green around the gills and staring mournfully at the horizon.
4:30 PM - 5:30 PM: Pool Time. (If the boat tour didn't completely ruin me). Find the perfect spot, and then the perfect shade. Hopefully there aren't a bunch of kids running around screaming.
6:00 PM - 7:00 PM: Dress up. This is a vacation, after all. It’s time to embrace my inner beach bum.
7:00 PM - 9:00 PM: Dinner at a waterfront restaurant. Hopefully, the view is stunning, the food is delicious, and the waiter doesn't judge my questionable fashion choices. I need to find something amazing. I deserve it.
9:00 PM: Stargazing on the beach (If I'm not too exhausted). If I make it here, I will count my blessings.
Day 3: Retail Therapy, and Reality Checks
9:00 AM: Sleep in (If possible). Or at least, try to.
10:00 AM: Breakfast (Again). Hopefully, I remember to eat this time.
11:00 AM - 2:00 PM: Shopping! Explore the shops around Las Olas Boulevard. Buy something for myself, things I don’t need. I'm sure there are those quaint boutiques and maybe, just maybe, I'll find the PERFECT souvenir.
2:00 PM - 3:00 PM: Lunch at a cafe. Salad, maybe? Or should I go full vacation mode and order that giant, greasy sandwich I've been eyeing? Decisions, decisions…
3:00 PM - 5:00 PM: Back to the beach! Re-evaluate my life choices while watching the ocean. Take more photos, but this time not to forget that I will always remember the trip.
5:00 PM: Take a nap. Why the hell not?
6:30 PM: Find a nice restaurant and get the best dinner.
8:00 PM: Back to the hotel, and packing all the clothes that I will not wear.
Day 4: The Reluctant Departure
9:00 AM: One last breakfast. Sigh.
10:00 AM: Final beach walk. Soak in the last moment, thinking about all that I did.
11:00 AM: Check out. Ugh, the worst part.
11:30 AM: Farewell to the hotel staff, and get to the airport.
1:00 PM: Flight home. Back to reality.
Post-Trip: Spend the next week reliving the vacation through photos, dreaming of the next one, and starting to plan my escape back to Fort Lauderdale. Oh, and I’ll be permanently wearing that Hawaiian shirt.
The Messy Truth: This is just a rough outline. I'll probably get distracted, wander off in the wrong direction, and eat way too much ice cream. But hey, that's the beauty of travel, right? The unexpected detours, the happy accidents, and the realization that even when things don't go according to plan, they're still pretty darn good. Now, where's that coffee…?
Jamaica's Sandy Bay Secret: Unbelievable Charms Await at Arms of Charms Guesthouse!
Escape to Paradise: Ocean Mile Hotel – Your Fort Lauderdale Fiasco (and Maybe Heaven?) FAQs
Okay, so "Luxury Awaits!"...is that a promise or a prayer at Ocean Mile?
Look, "Luxury Awaits!" is definitely a vibe. It's like, they *intend* luxury. Picture this: arriving after a flight that felt longer than my last existential crisis (turbulence the size of a small aircraft!), and stepping into the lobby. The air conditioning? Bliss. The giant, gleaming chandelier? Okay, I'm sold. For about five minutes. Then reality sets in. Luxury, yeah, it's there... hidden amongst a few slightly scuffed surfaces, a very enthusiastic but slightly under-trained front desk guy, and the distinct scent of… well, let's just call it "ocean adjacent." But honestly? I kinda dug it. It felt...real. Not the sterile, perfect thing you see in the brochures.
What's the deal with the rooms? Are they actually nice? (And do they have…bugs?)
The rooms… ah, the rooms. Okay, full disclosure: my first room, let's just say it had a personality. A *very* enthusiastic personality. It was a bit… cozy. And by cozy, I mean it felt like the furniture had been borrowed from a very enthusiastic grandmother. But the view! OMG, the view! That, my friends, is where Ocean Mile shines. Woke up to the ocean every morning. Worth. Every. Penny. (and the slightly wonky armchair). As for bugs… listen. It's Florida. Embrace the local fauna. Found one tiny, harmless little friend (a tiny spider, bless its heart) in the corner. He was gone by the time I checked out. We had a silent understanding. He kept to himself, and I didn't, you know, scream. Close enough!
**Important Room Tip:** Request a room on a higher floor. Seriously. The lower floors… um… well, let's just say they might be closer to the… *ahem*… "ocean adjacent" smell source.
The pool. Is it as Instagrammable as it looks?
The pool… is mostly as instagrammable as it looks. Except in real life, it's always packed with people. Families, groups, the usual suspects. You'll be fighting for a sun lounger. And if you're lucky enough to snag one, prepare for the inevitable "accidental" splash from the kids doing cannonballs. (I may or may not have been the recipient of one such splash. Let's just say I needed a LOT of dry towels). BUT! The pool bar? Worth the potential waterboarding. The cocktails are strong, the staff are friendly, and you can generally just chill out and forget your life (or at least your responsibilities) for a few hours. Basically paradise.
What about the beach? Is it easy to get to?
The beach is RIGHT THERE. Like, step out of the hotel, and BAM! Sand. Ocean. Complete blissful chaos. It's ridiculously easy. You can practically roll out of bed and onto the sand. The hotel provides beach towels, which is a huge plus. Just be prepared for the sand to get EVERYWHERE. I'm still finding it. In my car. In my socks. In my *soul*. (Kidding...kinda).
Food. Is the hotel restaurant any good? (Be honest!)
Okay, let's get real about the food. The hotel restaurant? It's…fine. It's not going to win any Michelin stars, but it's convenient. And the breakfast buffet? A classic. Lots of options. Pancakes, waffles, eggs, the works. It’s the kind of place where you will accidentally eat way too much, and you'll enjoy every bite. I had a truly epic breakfast once. I'm talking, like, two plates of everything, plus a fruit salad the size of my head. I almost cried, it was so good. Or maybe it was the sheer volume of food. Whatever. Worth it. However, I recommend exploring the local restaurants. Fort Lauderdale has some amazing places to eat. Ask at the front desk for recommendations. You'll find some hidden gems!
What's the vibe like? Relaxed? Party-central? Somewhere in between?
The vibe? It’s a mix that depends on when you go, I tell ya. During the day, super relaxed. Families splashing in the pool, people strolling along the beach, generally chilling. At night, the pool bar gets hopping, and things get a little more… lively. Definitely not a crazy party scene, but not dead either. Think a laid-back atmosphere with a little bit of edge. Maybe a slightly loud karaoke night on a Saturday, with one of the guys at the front desk really letting loose. Pure gold.
**Side note about that Karaoke night:** It was... memorable. The guy could *sing*. And he knew EVERY song. Including some real deep cuts. I have a video, but, out of respect for the hotel, I'm keeping it private. (mostly).
Hidden Gems? What's something the average tourist might miss?
Okay, here's a hidden gem: walk south on the beach for about 20 minutes. Way past the crowded sections. You'll find a little patch of sand that's almost deserted. Bring your own towels and drinks, of course. But it's pure, unadulterated bliss. Sun, sand, and quiet. That's the real luxury. Another tip: The sunset view from the balconies is amazing. Don't miss it. Buy a bottle of wine at the local store and watch the sun go down. Trust me.
Would you go back? (The ultimate question!)
Absolutely. Without a doubt. Yes. Even with the slightly-less-than-pristine surfaces and the potential for a rogue spider encounter. I'd go back in a heartbeat. It’s not flawless, and It's probably not the most luxurious hotel in Fort Lauderdale. But it has charm. It has a soul. And it has that *view*. And sometimes, that's all you really need. Plus, the memories? Priceless. (Except for the price of the room, of course. But still, worth it.)
